Christmas can be a fractious time for everyone, and even more stressful for those whose decision to divorce has been postponed until after the festive season. But whatever your reasons for wanting to get divorced, are you right to wait until the new year to start divorce proceedings? Read on to find out.
Christmas can be a fractious time for everyone, and even more stressful for those whose decision to divorce has been postponed until after the festive season. But whatever your reasons for wanting to get divorced, are you right to wait until the new year to start divorce proceedings? Read on to find out.
If you are experiencing issues with your relationship and you feel you need legal advice to resolve matters, contact specialist family solicitor Maria Coster of Stowe Family Law. Maria has an excellent record in family law matters as well as being involved in a number of complex cases involving issues such as domestic violence, substance misuse, and parental alienation.
Why do people start divorce proceedings straight after Christmas?
Historically, January always tends to see a marked uptick in the number of divorce applications being made to the court, with 27% more divorces being filed in the first month of the year than at any other time. The first working Monday of the year is often named “divorce day” because so many couples take the first step towards accepting that their relationship is not working by seeking advice about getting divorced. One reason the divorce rate may be so high around New Year is because many people see it as a clean sheet and an opportunity for change.
Some people take the first tentative steps and contact a solicitor before Christmas to get an idea about what to expect, some just want reassurance that they are considering is right thing. In many respects, getting a divorce after Christmas is no different from any other time of year because it is still an enormous decision with significant consequences.
What are the considerations for waiting until after Christmas to get divorced?
No one can tell you whether you’ve made the right decision to wait until after Christmas to start divorce proceedings, as everyone’s circumstances are different. But here are some things to consider:
- Avoiding additional holiday stress
Christmas can be a stressful time for all concerned, but it can also be a time of joy and togetherness. Divorces often take a long time to finalise, and added to that solicitor’s offices and courts tend to be closed between Christmas and New Year, nothing will be advanced in the run up to Christmas.
- Be aware of giving your spouse and/or children false hope
Christmas can be a time when couples try to rekindle their relationships, often “for the sake of the kids”. If you are adamant that your relationship is over, waiting until after the holiday period may give your spouse the idea that you’ve changed your mind.
- Relatives
Any negative interference from “well-meaning” friends or relatives can be detrimental to your mental health. In this case, you may want to keep news of the divorce quiet until the new year.
- Toxic family environments
Arguments are sometimes impossible to avoid over Christmas and if you are in a toxic relationship or abusive situation, it may be better to start proceedings sooner rather than later.
How do I tell my spouse I want a divorce?
Before telling your spouse that you want a divorce, it makes sense to prepare them over time. Discuss divorce as a growing likelihood, and think carefully about where, how, and when you will tell your spouse that the marriage is over. If you are concerned that your spouse may have a violent response, consider whether you should have someone else close at hand who can step in if necessary. Or break the news in a public place with some privacy, such as a coffee shop or restaurant. The public setting will encourage your spouse to respond in a rational and restrained fashion.
Doing all these things beforehand can help your spouse to get used to the idea the marriage might end ahead of you telling them you want a divorce. The less of a shock it is, the more likely it will be that they will be able to cope with the news.
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